


Could've Been One Lonely Night

by Gloomy_sunflower101



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, Azumane Asahi is a Good Significant Other, Comfort/Angst, Depression, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Gender- Neutral Reader, Guilt, Guilty Reader, No Smut, Pain, Reader Needs a Hug, References to Depression, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Short One Shot, author is projecting, depressed reader, reassurance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:55:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27158948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloomy_sunflower101/pseuds/Gloomy_sunflower101
Summary: Reader has a bad day with depression and self isolates,  but Asahi is there to comfort them :)*trigger warning: depression, bad thoughts *
Relationships: Azumane Asahi/Reader, Azumane Asahi/You
Kudos: 37





	Could've Been One Lonely Night

**Author's Note:**

> * Disclaimer: I am in no way an expert, everything writtern is based on my own experiences, I apologize in advance if it seems off.

The lights were off, the room was eerily quiet. You were staring at the ceiling. It felt like another person was in charge of your body, like your mind had been disconnected and was just idly trapped inside. The phone beside you buzzed, for the third time. You don’t know why you bothered counting, simply reaching for it seemed impossible. The light from the screen illuminated the room, you watched it fade on the ceiling as the call was missed. You knew who it was. The only person who could possibly make you feel like a human again. Yet, you couldn’t face him. It felt like wrong knowing that your lifeline was reaching out while you were content to drown in your own thoughts; old habits die hard. Despite the general numbness you had felt for the past few days, you were hit with a surge of guilt. 

Somehow you had managed to doze off, your lack of sleep the past few days finally catching up to you. You flinched when you heard a knock on your door. The time was 10:00 pm, or so your phone said. You glanced at the notifications shining brightly on your lockscreen, all were unsurprisingly from your boyfriend. The door slowly crept open, you couldn’t find it in you to care. The silhouette of Asahi Azumane didn’t leave much suspense,anyway. Your giant softie’s frame was unmistakable. You sat up and watched his figure move gracefully across your floor, well what you could see of it. To say your room was a mess would be an understatement; it was littered with clothing, your journals, and even some assignments. He finally reached the bed and sat on the edge by your feet. 

“Baby? Can you please turn on your little light so I can see that pretty face?”, he called out softly. 

You turned on your bedside lamp wordlessly. The light was dim, but it seemed to be enough. You were still able to see his shy and unsure smile. 

“There you are! I was worried about you all day.”, he said meeting your eyes. You don’t know what he saw there but it seemed to make him sad before he fixed his expression. 

“Hi.”, you said, suddenly embarrassed about making him worry. Asahi was easily the most intimidating looking guy at Karasuno, but he was anything but. He was secretly a teddy bear who wouldn’t hurt a fly. This was a fact, you still remember the small argument that ensued after he insisted you spare a certain spider and “just let it go outside”. You knew how much he cared about you and how much he worried over every little thing. 

“Hi pumpkin, I missed you at school. Of course, we all missed you at practice,I think Noya and Tanaka cried twice.”, he said, reaching for you. You were basically an unofficial team manager at this point. The new Coach Ukai didn’t seem to mind as long as you weren’t distracting Asahi too much. You normally used the time doing any homework or tossing to some of the boys. You were in no way talented at volleyball, but you weren’t the worst. 

You moved over and made room for him next to you on your bed. Asahi was still shy and a little awkward, so you knew he would never move closer unless invited. He moved and sat next to you. You allowed yourself to be pulled into his chest and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding as you felt his toned arms wrap around you. You avoided his gaze and instead began fiddling with the bottom of his shirt, running your fingers over the frayed ends. 

“Bad day?”, he asked, running his hands over back, soothing you instantly. 

“Yeah, sorry about the calls and texts. I know you worry.”, you said watching your hands become blurry. When did you begin feeling sad? When did you last feel anything?

This was always your least favorite part of your episodes. Logically you knew that you had been happy or sad or excited before; it was just during times like this where your brain tricked you and made it seem like it had never and would never feel that way again. 

“It’s okay, pumpkin, I know how hard it is for you to reach out on days like this.”, he said in his soft voice.

“I just don’t understand why I feel like this, I hate it Asahi. Don’t you want someone normal? You deserve someone happy. I’m sorry. ”, you said, watching your tear drop onto his shirt, turning the light gray material darker. 

“You’re perfect the way you are. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s out of your control, it's as serious and real as a physical injury. I don’t think any less of you because of your depression. If anything, it gives me something else to love you for; your strength. You never let it beat you, I wouldn’t want anyone else.”, he mumbled, gently grabbing your face, wiping your tears. 

“Still I know how it hurts you and worries you, and I still do the shitty thing and self-isolate. I just want to be the significant other who there’s for you, instead I’m just a burden, as if you don’t have enough to worry about between-”, you were cut off of your spiral when Asahi pulled in closer and tighter than he ever had. It hurt slightly, but nonetheless, it felt right. He held you so tight, you felt the weight in your chest disappear while you buried your head in the crook of his neck. 

“Don't ever call yourself a burden in front of me. You are not, you’re y/n. My y/n. I love you and I just wish you could understand how much you mean to me. I’m here for you however you need me. If you can’t bring yourself to answer my calls, I’ll come to you, wherever you are, always.”, he said. 

You finally looked up and saw tears leaking out of his eyes as well. His tone was firm, genuine, but not broken by his emotions. It didn’t make the fog surrounding you disappear, your surroundings were still dark; however, there was a light at the end of the tunnel. It was Asahi. You knew you had to survive this to get to him and for him. 

“I love you, Azumane.”, you said and surprised even yourself with how sincere you were being. 

“I love you too, y/n. Now get some rest, then we’ll get something to eat. I’m sure you must be a little hungry.”, he said returning to rubbing your back.  
You felt the numbness dissipate, at least for the time being, replaced by peace instead. He chatted about his day. Apparently, Suga hit Kageyama with a volleyball to stop a fight between the new setter and Hinata; he rambled on until you felt yourself drift off again.

**Author's Note:**

> I love Asahi sm


End file.
